Sunday, March 28, 2010

There's No Place Like Home...

Fog in the VA mountains

Although Squirrel learned a lot and had a fabulous time on campus [whole point of the trip, right?] this picture [taken by Wallene on the way home] pretty much sums up how dank and dark this weekend turned out to be. I usually like the clouds in the mountains, but was so bone chilling cold and just yuck.

I learned that long car rides are a no-no, that you really do need a wheelchair accesible room when checking into a hotel [I didn't request one - the hotel was wonderful] and rest stop bathrooms for the walking-ly challenged really aren't suitable for a wheelchair. Sounds sobby doesn't it?

Really tho', it isn't why this weekend was so sad. I took my laptop for the kids to goof on and use for school - but I didn't want to be bothered by the 'net this weekend [no offense tadpoles] it is just I was miserable from the car ride and uncomfortable. Basically I was feeling sorry for myself. When the family went out to dinner on Saturday night I stayed back and clicked on the 'net.

Then I saw the simple title "Eva" in my email and I knew. Feeling sorry for myself is one thing - I do think I got a raw deal with the Lupus, but I ain't changing the world - Eva did. For anyone who as ever met Eva, read her blog or have seen her award winning documentary really understands what a raw deal is. Such a beautiful soul, life, person to be robbed of this world so soon and so painfully. What a fighter Eva is. And I know she is at peace and no longer in pain and for her to live would mean someone else would've have to die - but really? This world is a poorer place because Eva isn't here anymore and there simply aren't more people like her.

I want to write so much more - I want the diseases that are killing special people like her cured - hell I want to stop crying [about life in general]. But you can't always get what you want - right?

Thanks for listening. And thank you for the kind words on the last post.


Phelan said...

Welcome home! Sorry it wasn't the best trip. Maybe next time right?

I thought about you all day. Weird, scary. . . not stalking though ;)

oh, I will tell you about it later, the why.

Get some rest.

Rudee said...

The weather may have been bad, but the photo is compelling. Wallene takes a good picture.

While I know you don't want sympathy, I'm sorry for the shitty hand you got dealt. Lupus sucks--big time.

I hope you're feeling better, soon.

And Skippy, I never read Eva's blog until the other day when I followed your link. I can plainly see what you mean. She was a special soul.

Diane Laney Fitzpatrick said...

Sorry about your not-so-great trip, Eva, the wheelchair access, rain in general, and everything else. I disagree with you - you are just as effective at changing the world as Eva was. Every time you make someone think of something good, put something into perspective for them, they will most likely pay it forward and your impact increases. You don't need a documentary or millions of followers to do that.

life in the mom lane said...

I have to agree with Diane Skippy. You have left me messages which have really brightened MY day on more than one occasion. I really look forward to your comments. Also considering that physically you are not 100% right now- that you even went on the college trip is a MAJOR deal. Just proves what a giving person/mother you are.

You are the one who turned me on to Eva's blog- it is so sad that she is gone- she had a beautiful soul. Made me often think how wimpy my own whining sounds like.

OmaLindasOldeBaggsandStuftShirts said...

I too have to agree with Diane and Life in the Mom Lane, you too are a very special soul. There have been times in my little corner of insanity that you are the only person who has made me smile, or think how I could think differently about something I have said or felt. I always thought you are the chairperson of the Sunshine Committee. You are a wonderful person. I am blessed to have found you. And I must thank you for pointing my way to Eva a few months back. She was a sparkler and yes the world will miss her so much. Couldn't even remark yesterday on your post just sent loving thoughts to all who loved her.
Sorry your trip was ugly. Wallene did a super job with the photo though. (((hugs))) until next time
vert word is exclank...that is when you find someone you like and you exclank email addresses, it's when you take back a toast with wine classes.

Yum Yucky said...

I think it's so foggy that I can't see the pic??

And now I'm off to click the link and learn more about Eva.

Teresa said...

I think I've driven through that foggy VA countryside. So dreary and tough to do!

You are a trouper and I'm so glad that I found your blog. Whenever I'm feeling a bit sorry for myself, I read everyone else's blogs and when I get to yours I remember that I don't have it so bad - I can get up and walk out of the rooom if someone is irritating the living daylights out of me. Not that I do, but I can .

I'm sorry your trip was so tough on you. I know that Ron has some setbacks after we travel, so I can only imagine how tired you were and how ready you were to get back home.

I agree with Diane and everyone else - you are a great inspiration to many.