Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Bonus Wednesday Post - It's a Comic

After I posted earlier this morning I got bored so I drew a comic.  Enjoy! And have a great day. :)
Click it - it is easier to read.

Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, No, No, Yes

I like doing these posts, I just don't do them very often.

YES - My wonderful husband made beef stew tonight.  It is one of my favorite meals that I can actually keep down, so it was a bonus all the way around.  Thank you honey!

YES - I love this quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson: "Most of the shadows of life are caused by standing in our own sunshine."

YES - The weather has been stunning. I can't remember the last time we had several days of 80 degree weather in August.

YES - Labor Day weekend is going to be here soon.  And it is Wallene's 14th birthday. Double YES!

NO - I can't remember whose blog I read that quote on, so I can't give credit. [Let me know in comments if it was you, please? And thank you!]

NO - The new Band Mom at Wallene's high school is so over the top she makes us all bananas.  It is a hard job keeping track of 130 kids, and I do appreciate her hard work, but really?  I do not need 4 emails every single day describing the same thing [in different ways] with each one taking me 30 minutes to read through [they are long!]  Get your facts straight the first time and stop over analyzing every question you are asked.  We aren't stupid, but you are condescending. [I never email her - these are mass emails to all of us.]

YES - This is the 1,000th post I have written.  Although not all 1,000 are published [I have 183 drafts kept private for my family] I have managed to publish 817 since November, 2008.  Not too shabby.

I hope your Wednesday is filled with all YES with no NOES.  Have a great one Tadpoles.  I am off to have beef stew for breakfast. :)

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Best Name EVER

While watching 48 hour coverage of Hurricane Irene [sigh - because we had NO choice] they had to occasionally swap out weather forecasters in order to give them all a bit of a break to go eat, sleep and potty.

For the first time, while watching ABC news, we were gifted with the most awesome meteorologist.

His name is Roosevelt Leftwich.

This is him:
I think more people should be named Roosevelt and be as cute and informative as Mr. Leftwich.

He made the news coverage more palpable at 2 am when we kept seeing the same images [and non damage] we had been watching for hours.


Monday, August 29, 2011

First Day of School

Our [last] high school freshman 

Where did she go da' Mommas?
Have a great day Tadpoles.

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Once Again With the Toilet Paper

I really shouldn't mention to Pooldad that we are a little low on toilet paper in the bathroom.  
Here's why:
I laughed hysterically at his little pyramid.
Next he surprised me with this:
I decided it was toilet paper wars and so I did this:
It says "Don't Mess With My Toilet Paper Mr.Man!"
That got a good laugh from Pooldad.
 Wallene wanted to play, so she left Daddy a note too.

I keep telling you guys you want to live here.  
If just for the things we figure out to do with Charmin.

It's not everyone that spends a Sunday night photographing toilet paper, right?
Enjoy your Monday Tadpoles. I hope it is a great week for y'all!

Hurricane Irene Has Nothing on the Disaster That is WalMart

You wouldn't know our little part of Virginia had a category 1 hurricane yesterday.  By "little part" I mean our specific city.  It sprinkled, drizzled, rained a bit and the wind blew, but nothing out of the ordinary from a regular stormy day.  Communities around us have trees and power lines down with no electricity, but seems everyone was prepared and clean up is going fast and smooth.

Yesterday we took Wallene school shopping.  Very important trip as this is her first year in high school.  We wanted to make sure she had everything she needed so it promised to be a very long day.

I wanted out of WalMart immediately upon entering, tho' it was our first stop.  I thought I was over my hatred for WalMart, but I will tell you right now I will never go into our neighborhood WalMart again.  Ever again.  The last time I was in this particular one I swore it off [4 years ago] but this time it is going to stick.

What a mess. What chaos.  What RUDE people.  And I don't mean the employees.  THEY were wonderful and helpful and polite.

But the customers?  Jiminy Christmas. What a joke.  I realize the place was packed because of back to school shopping and the impending storm but it is no reason to forget your manners folks.

Now, I was in a wheelchair, and I honestly don't expect people to watch out for me - although I am hard to miss, heehee - but when Pooldad parked me off to the side while he and Wallene gathered pens, paper and notebooks you would not believe what I witnessed.  Or maybe you would, but I was stunned at how awful [and stupid] people can be.  I like people watching, but this bordered on the absurd.

  • Walking INTO the store through the EXIT door is just wrong.  Especially when English is your first language and there are people streaming OUT of it. I am pretty sure you can read the EXIT sign gang.
  • Turning your back on your toddler, who is now standing up in the seat of your grocery cart, is a recipe for disaster.  PAY ATTENTION to him.  If it hadn't been for Pooldad the kid would've taken a header.  Picking out the perfect three ring binder for his older sister is NOT worth the concussion your kid would've incurred. [A thank you would've nice too.]
  • Leaving your cart in the middle of some random aisle, removing your  paid for purchases and abandoning the cart there is a douchecanoe move.  You know it, I know it and when I sputter "Are you really leaving that there?"  [I couldn't help myself, I was shocked.] Don't shoot me a dirty look and then drag your cart off like that was your intention the whole time.  We made eye contact and?  You suck.
  • When someone is ahead of you online STOP running into them with your cart.  We're not getting there any faster than you and hitting my wheelchair your cart does not speed up the process of check out.  I wasn't even AT the register yet.  After the third time of being bumped forward [with the brake on] I turn to you and say "Could you please back up a bit and not hit me?"  Is not your cue to mouth "bitch" at me.  Learn some patience.  We ALL want out of the madhouse.
  • While the optician is engaged fitting another customer with glasses is not the appropriate time to approach the optician and say [as fast as you can so no one can interrupt] "This will just take a moment. I need help. Where do I find blah, blah, blah?"  You were not there first and it is not your turn. And it didn't take "just a moment" - you held those people up for quite a bit.
  • When you bump into, want to get by someone or just need to see something and your view is blocked - the appropriate words are "Excuse me" or "Perdoname". Acting clueless and body slamming on purpose is unacceptable behavior in a store that is this crowded.  Manners - get you some.
That isn't everything, but you get the idea.  The laziness, rudeness and self entitlement of people in this country astounds me.  If it wasn't for the really cute little kids that said "hi" to me while I waited for Pooldad and Wallene to be done and the exceptional employees [Naer you are awesome!] I might have run someone over myself.

But, nah....not really.

I will just stay out of WalMart in my city.

Friday, August 26, 2011

Thank You Linda

Thank you for telling me to get off my behind and just go.
For telling me that the hang up was mine and that no one would care. They didn't.  The principal freaked me out a little bit, big deal. [The man is tall when you are sitting on wheels.]

You were right.  Everyone was so nice and only one teenager fell on me. One! :P heehee

It was spectacular to see our baby march on the field for her first time.  It made me cry.  Wallene was so surprised and happy to see me there.

I thank you. Pooldad thanks you and you get a great big hug from Wallene.

You're da' awesomes Momma.

Dachshund Rollover

This video is six years old, but it still makes me laugh.  It is Squirrel teaching our new puppy, Spot, how to roll over.  It took about a half an hour and 4 cups of Frosted Cheerios. [The video is only 20 seconds long. It is the end result.  She still does it to this day.] 
 If you listen closely you can hear Wallene and me in the background.  Wallene sounds like she is 3 years old.  She was 8 and Squirrel was 13.
And no comments on the laundry in the background.  We were living in an apartment and that was the only place to really sort it. heehee

Hope it puts a smile on your face and you enjoy your weekend.  It's going to be fun - even with a hurricane bearing down, right?

Oh, and Wallene marches for the first time tonight with the Titans and her sister is officially marching with the Royal Dukes at JMU.  I am so proud of our girls.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Truth is Thursday. . .

The fabulous and funny Julianna over at Surviving Boys (Mom 2 Mental Midgets) does a post every Thursday called "Truth is Thursday".  I enjoy hers so much that, on her invitation, I have decided to play along too.  Such fun!  If you like the idea you are more then welcome to join and link up over at her blog on Thursdays. YAY!

Here goes. . . .

Truth is. . . . .I am still wrecked from the car trip on Sunday.  I want to feel better. Yesterday. Dagnabit.

Truth is. . . . .I ate a .75 cent frozen pizza last night and it was really tasty.  Or I was just really hungry.  I think it was 50-50.

Truth is. . . . I am getting kind of excited for school shopping this weekend. [Okay, who just fainted?]  I think it will be fun to outfit Wallene for high school and I love me some new school supplies. heehee

Truth is. . . .I am glad August is almost over.  I am ready for September to be here and to see the leaves change, the swimming pools close and my husband to work 4 days a week instead of 5. BONUS!

Truth is. . . .earthquakes are not my cup of tea.  I don't know how my west coast friends deal with the big ones, because 5.9 is about all I ever want to go through again.  It was literally one of the top 10 weirdest things I have ever experienced in my life.  Oh, and the aftershocks can stop anytime they want. Thank you.

Truth is. . . . I have had to rethink my view on Wal Mart.  Although I dislike their business practices and have boycotted them for years, there is no denying they are the cheapest place in town and in this economy.....

Truth is. . . . I think my last statement just made me a hypocrite.  Oh well, after the stock market tank - we need to really watch our pennies.

Truth is. . . .this was fun. I think I will do it again next week.

Please take a moment to go over and visit Juliana as she is getting married on Saturday! WOOT!

Have a wonderful Thursday Tadpoles.  I bet it is going to be a great day!!

Tuesday, August 23, 2011


We just had an earthquake. Shot the dog right off the couch and things were falling.

In VIRGINIA.  5.9 magnitude.  The epicenter is in Mineral, VA.

I hope that everyone is okay wherever you are on the east coast as this reached as far north as New York and as far south as South Carolina.

Excuse me while I go pick up. And catch my breath.

This was SO NOT on my bucket list.

One of My Favorite Products

I don't usually shill things on my blog, but sometimes something comes along that you just have to share.

For most of my life - okay, 43 of my 44 1/2 years, I bit my nails. [eww, I know. hush]  Anytime I wanted to have nice, long, beautiful nails I had to drop $25 for a manicure with the fake plastic tips.  Yick.

Not anymore.  After falling ill last year I stopped biting my nails and they have grown out beautifully.  But?  They are a pain in the patoot.  I obviously missed the lessons on girlie stuff earlier in life because filing, painting, polishing and keeping these suckers up had turned into a huge chore. [Don't get me started on make up.] I know I have A LOT of time to spare, but jeesh Tadpoles - I hate painting my nails.  Then waiting for them to dry.  Being careful to not smudge them.  That is a half hour I am not getting back.  BAH.

I would rather be fishing.

Anyway, I asked Wallene if she had any polish I could borrow because I was getting tired of looking at my plain ol' nails and thought I would spiff them up a bit. [Pooldad likes him some pretty nails on Skippy too!]

She gave me this:
"Mandarin Heat" by Maybelline
I saw the "Express Finish" name and the "50 second nail color" hype and thought "Yeah, sure."  But decided to try it. What the heck, right? Maybe it would dry in 5 minutes as opposed to the 10 or 15 I usually have to endure.

Wrong! This is NOT false advertising.  I am not kidding.  This stuff ABSOLUTELY dries in 50 seconds.  I think it actually dries faster and it goes on soooo smooth.  I can paint my own nails in under 5 minutes [two coats] and be able to type, pick up stuff, pet the dog - whatever - with nary a smudge.  And I am the queen of impatience, so,  for it to dry that fast and look great - well yessirree Bob!  Buy me more colors.
As I said, I really hate doing my own nails, but never thought I would have the gift of not paying someone to do it for me.  Maybelline Express Finish makes it so, so easy.  If you do your own manicures I cannot recommend this enough.

*Disclaimer: blah, blah, blah - No I was not paid or given nail polish in exchange for this review. I just borrowed my daughter's polish.  Now I am going to go and clean out CVS of the other cool colors.

Hope you all are having a great Tuesday and are enjoying a sunshiny day!

Monday, August 22, 2011

The Inadvertent Shoplifter

Raise your hand if you know which one of us stole from the local campus store yesterday.

I wasn't out of the car - so if you guessed me? Nope.
Pooldad was pumping gas - so if you guessed him? Nope.
Squirrel was at band - so if you guessed her? Nope.

But, if your first guess was Wallene? You are a winner!
While on our roadtrip yesterday Wallene had mentioned she wished she had brought a book or something to read.  Fair enough. The kid loves to read - anything - and was a bit bored during the five hour trip. [This is important to the story in a moment.]

As we were leaving Harrisonburg we stopped to get gas [$3.39 - such a bargain!].  Pooldad and Wallene went inside to pay and pick up refreshments.  While Daddy stepped outside to pump gas she was still inside.

Finished, they piled in the car and we were on the road.

Twenty minutes later we heard a crinkling sound from the back seat and Wallene exclaimed "Oh! I know where THAT is!"

Dad glanced at me with a quizzical look and then asked her "What?"

She responded "The Naval Memorial in Washington, DC."

His next question was "Wallene what are you looking at?"

She replied "A map of Washington, DC."

I asked "And where, pray tell, did you get this map Wallene?"

She innocently said "You know those map displays they have in stores where you can just pick one?  Well, I picked DC."


I asked her to hand me the map and after examining it I discovered that it was an huge road map and the SKU on the back indicated it cost $4.95.

Sigh.  She thought it was a free display and just picked her favorite place to explore.  And walked out with it!

Guess who sent off $5.20 to the corner store on campus?
With an apology.

If you guessed Skippy you would be right. :)

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Neither Torrential Rains, Falling Hail or [40 MPH] Winds Will Keep Us From Our Mission

Wellllll, THAT was interesting.

Taking our daughter back to college today was such a fun trip.  It started out bright and sunshiny  We left around 10:30, having packed the night before, when 100 miles into our trip we hit severe storms.  We had rain, we had hail, we had winds that I thought were going to pick up a cow out of one of the fields that run along the highway and toss it at the car.  It went on for almost 25 miles and we were reduced to speeds between 30 - 35 miles per hour due to poor visibility.  At one point we had to pull over and sit to wait because we couldn't see.

Thank goodness for this guy.  My hero.

The man can drive.  
I trust him above all others, but boy-o I was a nervous wreck.  HE can drive, but what is it with people that feel the need to go over the speed limit when it is zero visibility?  Do they have magic windshield wipers I don't know about?  Super powers only "special" people get? [For what it is worth we have four brand new tires and brand new windshield wipers.  You couldn't see and it was hard to control.]  Sigh. They are special all right - especially stupid.  I am surprised we didn't see more accidents than we did.

We finally arrived at 1:30. An hour late.  First we checked Squirrel into band. 20 seconds max.  Next we went over to her new home for the next year and checked her in there.  Again, 20 seconds, with a slight hiccup with the wrong key. No worries. Done.  BONUS!  Her room is located at the back of the dorm, approximately 20 steps out two [security] doors to where we had parked to unload with no stairs. YAY!  Squirrel, Wallene and Dad unloaded in under 10 minutes. It was amazing.  We spent a little time setting up her room, but had to go grab a quick bite to eat before we had to drop Squirrel off at band.  The Royal Marching Dukes sure get on it fast!  We dropped her off at 3:30, said goodbye [sniff, sniff - okay, okay waaaaaaaaaah!] and had a rain free trip back home.

We walked in the door at 5:30 and found our own little rainbow after the storm waiting for us:
The birthday cake from last night.
We don't know if the snow man is excited that he has his own piece of cake
 or if we accidentally suffocated him.
On another fun note - Squirrel neglected to mention that her dorm has co-ed floors.  Imagine Pooldad's shock and consternation when he was reading the names on all the doors and noticed "Mike", "Tim" and "Trevor" living next door. giggle - Yep, there was NO explaining that one away.

I am completely wrecked from the trip, but it was so worth it. I am glad our baby is safe, sound and back at a place that makes her so happy, doing what she loves.

See ya' on the flipside Tadpoles. Enjoy your week.  I hope it is sunshiny with no hail or flying cows. :wink:

Goodbye, Good Luck And OH, By The Way? Happy Birthday

For the second year in a row we are taking Squirrel back to college on her birthday.

Very inconvenient, but it is what it is.  So, with that in mind I present our last day together.

We had dinner - Corned Beef and Cabbage [Squirrel's pick] - she is definitely her Momma's daughter:
We had cake - it is a rainbow. The girls made it.  The inside is all the colors of the rainbow and Wallene decorated the outside
And we had presents:
Although it is Squirrel's birthday on Sunday we celebrated Saturday night.  We also allowed her to give the presents she bought for her little sister, Wallene, tongiht, because they won't be together in two weeks when Wallene's birthday is.  The bag on the left is from Squirrel - the wrapped presents on the right are from Mom, Dad and Wallene to Squirrel.
Notice the matching wrapping? COMPLETELY ACCIDENTAL.  I swear.  Dad didn't know what Squirrel had bought for wrapping and brought home the same stuff.  It was a "Twilight Zone" moment.  They think alike, eh?  Pretty cool.

Squirrel didn't give us any idea what she wanted so we just guessed and gave her this:
 A flat screen TV for her dorm room!
I think it was a hit. :)

Love you Daddy!

Happy Birthday to our beautiful Squirrel.  We are so proud of  you and are going to miss you [AGAIN] when we drop you off at college in a wee few hours. 

I wish I didn't have to let you go my girl.
Be safe and come home soon sweetheart.  We love you.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

They're Not Tattoos Grandma, I Swear

When Squirrel came home last week she brought a henna kit with her.  It is a skin dye that is non permanent, but it does last for a few weeks.

Her and Wallene got busy and created these:
Squirrel & Wallene
Cool, huh?  Squirrel even did one on my wrist. Neat.

Since they were going to visit their Grandparents on Sunday I asked that they PLEASE wear tennis shoes or some such footwear so their Grandparents wouldn't be alarmed by the tattoo like appearance of their work. [

Yeah. Since when do kids listen to Mom?

Squirrel skipped out of here in a pretty dress and a pair of strappy sandals without me noticing.  Dad, who took them, was about as clueless.

God bless their great Grandmother.  She instantly noticed and complimented Squirrel on the artwork.  Grandpa wasn't quite so impressed and asked if it was permanent.  He was relieved to discover it wasn't and even more impressed when he discovered that Wallene had created the design on Squirrel's foot and Squirrel had done Wallene's as they were free hand [no stencil.]

I love having these guys home with me. It is never a dull moment.

Oh, and may I mention the "boyfriend" is driving down from Pennsylvania today to take Squirrel to lunch for her birthday?

It promises to be an interesting Thursday.  I am seriously considering making them take Wallene with them. 'Cause I am evil Skippy like that.


Hope y'all have a great day.  Enjoy - it is going to be a great one, dontcha' know?

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Skippy Foibles - Or Reason #284 Why This Isn't My Fault

You guys know I am always doing goofy things that result in injury or pain, right?

Well, I have a new injury [no pain involved]. And it is all because I laughed too hard.

Can  you actually laugh TOO hard?

I now know that you can.

But, laughing should not cause damage, right?

In Skippyland it evidently does.

Pooldad and I were sitting around last night after the kids went to bed and we started to talk about our favorite "Saturday Night Live" skits.  We were laughing about the best of them.

This led me to trying to find them online.

Gotta love heehee

I came across a skit with Jimmy Fallon and Robert Deniro that made me laugh so hard I literally had ginger ale bubbling out of my nose.  I am not kidding.  Straight shot from my mouth right through the nostrils.  I am surprised I didn't wake the kids up with my laughter and the subsequent choking.  Believe me, you will choke on that.  Goodness knows it took a lot of paper towels to clean that mess up.

[You're welcome for the mental pic'.]

What I discovered this morning was even more fun!  While talking to the girls Squirrel piped up and asked, "Mom what did you do to your eye?"  I said I didn't know and went to look.

Nice .... seems I popped a blood vessel in my eye from laughing so hard.  Now I have a great big blood spot next to my iris - so attractive! [Vogue, call - I have a new look!]

[Yes, you are welcome for the second, graphic mental pic'.]

I am used to pulling muscles from laughing, but never have I busted a vessel in MY EYE doing it.

I blame Jimmy and Robert.

[See? NOT my fault.  I told you so.]

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

When A Bad Outfit Gets Good..... being gone.
Happiest of Tuesdays Tadpoles.

Monday, August 15, 2011

No, Really, I'm Not a Wannabe

My apologies to Ms. Guisewite
She is the author and owner of the "Cathy " comic strip.
To view an example of Ms. Guisewite's wonderful work you can go here.  This strip ran for 34 years in over 1,400 papers. [I think only in the US.]
I don't aspire to publish my silly comics anywhere but here. They came about because of a broken keyboard and the fact that they entertain my family.    

My family.  The reason I write this blog in the first place.  Having Tadpoles as friends is just a wonderful, added bonus that I never expected.  Next to my family y'all bring a lot of joy and sunshine into an otherwise limited, very shortened kind of life.

If I bore you or you find what I write and draw mediocre, by all means, take me off your blog roll and don't read me.  It won't hurt my feelings.  I promise.

Hope y'all are having a great Monday and I hope you enjoy the comic. :)

Blessings To Be Counted

A visit today to the Grandparents:
Great Granddaughters with their Great Grandma - 99 1/2 years old

Grandson/Son with his Grandma and his Parents - His parents will be 80 next year

Front left -  counter clockwise:
Biz, Wallene, Nono, Squirrel and Noni
Such a gift.

Friday, August 12, 2011

Friday Comic

Hope you all are enjoying your wind down to the week!  Hugs and good thoughts.

Winner, Winner, Chicken Dinner

What a lovely evening to dine alfresco.  It was so cool and breezy we ate outside on our deck.
I know, I know - I take the suckiest pictures, but this was really yummy and I wanted to share.

Since Pooldad was the shopper for the last two weeks' worth of groceries I have been discovering some very interesting things in the 'fridge and the pantry.  Yesterday's find?  Chicken tenders and flour tortillas. 

What to make?  Seeing that we had a gorgeous orange tomato from my IL's garden, plus lettuce and onion I decided to pan fry the tenders [after dipping them] in a mix of parmesan cheese and italian style bread crumbs. Then we put them in the tortillas along with the veggies and viola'! Dinner!  I was thinking the kids might want some sort of sauce on them so Pooldad whipped up a sauce by combining mayonnaise, homemade bbq sauce and a bit of cajun spice. [You can see it in the little yellow dish with the spoon]  Holy wow - that stuff is good.  They didn't even look at the ranch dressing I put on the table just in case. ha!  Daddy's sauce rocks. I also served Mexican rice.  Dinner was so delicious there weren't any leftovers. [Poor Pooldad. Lunch will be boring today. :( ]

I make those type of tenders often but it had never occurred to me to stuff them in tortillas, like a wrap. The family liked them so much that both of the kids asked that they be made for their birthday dinners. heehee That makes me happy because they are so quick and easy to prepare. YAY!

I wonder what I can come up with tonight?

I am glad it is Friday. It will be nice to have the family around for two days instead of them being busy, busy all day long.

Oh, and this is what your outfit will look like when it is "Knee sock day" at band camp:
That's my girl! :)
Hope y'all have a great day and enjoy your weekend. Take care and see ya' on the flipside.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Looky Who's Home

And she brought a friend!
I kid, I kid. 
We left him in Pennsylvania.
He is very nice young man. :)
Biology geeks.
Ain't it sweet?
[Dad = not a fan of this picture]

Everyone is home safe and sound. Ahhh, now we can relax. :)

I Am Not Going To Make It

Grrrrrrrrr.  I think I have spent too much time in the car these past few weeks because my joints are screaming at me.  We are supposed to pick up Squirrel today, but I am dreading the thought of five hours in the car and I won't even be the one driving.

I could take pain medication, the heavy duty stuffs - but it makes me a bumbling fool when I do. [Okay, okay MORE of a bumbling fool. heehee] I took a pill last night and although it helped I was stoned.  I hate that feeling and I don't think I would be a very good co-pilot for Pooldad and absolutely no help once we got there.  I would probably get us lost attempting to read the directions. :)  Besides, Squirrel's new boyfriend will be there and I am pretty sure she would like me upright at our first meeting.

Oh well...such is my life.  I will keep content knowing that our baby will be home in less than 8 hours and we get to keep her for a whole 9* days before she leaves to go back to college.

Now, what do you think she is going to want for dinner?

Hope y'all have a beautiful Wednesday and we'll see you on the flipside.

*Yes, this is me being sarcastic. Why do you ask?

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

My Comic Tuesday

This happens in our home all the time, so I thought I would share.

No dachshunds were harmed in the making of this comic.

Enjoy your Tuesday Tadpoles.  Hope y'all have a great day. :)

Did I mention we get this one home tomorrow? WEEHAW! [The one on the right, obviously.]
Oh, and this is Wallene driving a golf cart.  Scariest hour of my life. :cough, cough:

PS: It was a really bad scan job on the cartoon. My apologies.

Monday, August 8, 2011

Um, I Don't Think That Was Supposed To Happen

Oops. giggle

While in the country this weekend we did what we usually do and went over to the fields to feed the horses carrots.  Pooldad's parents' home is located in a resort that has many activities, one of which is trail rides. Hence a great, big herd of horses.

They come in all shapes and sizes - from ponies all the way up to draft horses. But, Pooldad has a special spot in his heart for "Charlotte".  When he went riding with Wallene a few weeks ago they gave him Charlotte as his mount and I swear - when he arrived home, after the ride, he was give you an idea this is what Charlotte looks like:
photo credit
She is a big [HUGE] horse.  My husband was walking around, playing the "manly card" because they had put him on such a large horse. [Side note: The last time we went riding they put him on a regular sized trail horse.] This was an impressive feat, let me tell you.

Anyway - the carrots. We spend as much on carrots as we do gas when we go to the country.  Worth every penny tho'.

As there is never a dull moment in the pond - on Saturday we had a little mishap that we thought was pretty funny.

The horses are kept in pastures that are surrounded by a typical three board fence that is about 4 1/2 foot high - it hits me about chest level. When they see you have the goodies they will come over and hang their heads over the fence and eat right off of your palm.  It is great!  Some are more aggressive then others but you learn to look out for the little guys and make sure they get their treats too.

Charlotte was front and center during all of this and Pooldad was having a grand time feeding her carrots.  At one point  he ran out.  He turned and began to walk back to the car to get more while Wallene and I were a bit further down feeding the ponies.  Seems Charlotte didn't like that Pooldad had left so she decided to follow him. Through the fence, which gave way with the slightest touch of her massive chest.

CRACK!  The top board was gone and we were looking at an enormous animal that was now going to follow Dad. Yikes! Wallene started to run towards the barn office to let them know of an escape when Pooldad walked back up and nonchalantly said "Oh, don't think that was supposed to happen."

You think?

We kept them in the paddock area with a massive amount of carrots [and a bit of hand waving, eek!] until one of the workers arrived, jumped up on the second rail to block their escape and called maintenance on her walkie talkie.

Whew - Horse escape averted!

The funny line of the weekend was on the way home while we were talking about horses and Pooldad said about the trail ride he took on Charlotte, "You know what Skip?  I never realized my legs could spread that far."


Hope you guys had a great weekend. Sorry for the mess ups with the auto posts. I hit the wrong button - but whatever.  Have a great week and enjoy your Monday. Woohoo!

Saturday, August 6, 2011

The Best $10 I Ever Spent

Pooldad's netbook. My broken laptop.

Y'all know I am not a shopper.  I hate shopping.  Even spending $10 bucks is a pain in the patoot, so this post is not about shopping - except for the fact that I may have been inadvertently shopping for a husband without my knowledge.

I have my sister in law to thank for that.  Some of you may already know this story from my old blog, but I like it so much I am posting it again.  I hope you like it too.

It is long, so you may want to grab a beverage of choice and pull up a comfy chair. :)

Here goes!

It is a little detail-y at the beginning but you will see why.....

A year after SR left me, my brother decided to abandon his wife of two years, my best friend, Beth.  She was devastated. We all were.  She is an amazing woman and none of us saw it coming.  When my brother called to tell me he said two things "I am leaving Beth.  You have to tell Mom and Dad."  Nice, huh?  He didn't even have the back bone to tell my parents he had another failed marriage under his belt. I was perfectly clear to him, on the phone, that I would not choose between him and Beth and she would remain my friend.  He could've cared less, but it was the best decision I have ever made.

Beth and I talked daily and I knew how lonely she was, but......five months after he walked out Beth called me and invited me over to her house on a Sunday afternoon to, as she put it, "find us dates."  I told her no way.  I did not want to date, I was too busy working and raising kids and I just didn't need a man in my life right then.  She begged, pleaded, got teary eyed and then promised me Haagen Daas ice cream.  I didn't know what she had in mind but I picked up and went. Haagen Daas, what are you going to do?

When I arrived at her home she showed me this "neat" new feature on her local cable channel.  It was a scrolling list of personals. Like the newspaper ads of the time, but on TV. [This is pre internet gang]  I put the word neat in quotation marks because I am not a personals kind of gal, but for her sake I told her I would go along with it under one condition.  I would write a list of all my requirements and if I didn't find someone that matched I did not have to contact any one. She said okay.

I wrote of list of 42 things I was looking for in a man.  I thought I had an ace up my sleeve being so picky and that I was off the hook because no one - NO ONE could meet all 42, right?

Yeah, not with Skippy's luck.  Two matched 41 of the 42.  Funnily enough neither man had listed fishing as a like, but my persistent sister in law convinced me that it would behoove me to call the two that had everything else in common with my list.

Sigh.  The things you do for friendship and to entertain your friends.

If you don't know how personals work you have to call an 800 number and enter a code to leave a message for the person you want to speak to, so I started with the first guy.  The one who didn't end up my husband.  As I am certainly sure he was a nice guy he sounded so creepy my sister in law and I were in hysterics by the end of his message so I just hung up.  I barely worked up the nerve to call the code on the second guy.

Thank goodness I did, because THAT guy was Pooldad.  To say my knees went weak when I heard his voice on the message would not be exaggerating.  His voice could melt butter.  But I kept it cool.  I left a brief message telling him a little bit about myself ending with my phone number and the caveat to "please call after nine pm when I have my two kids in bed."

Although I wanted him to call, I still thought I would get off the hook with the kid line, he wouldn't call and no men in my life for the time being as I had wished.

Fate is too much fun sometimes.

Pooldad called me the following Tuesday evening and we talked for two hours. He explained that he had received another message from a woman before mine and was getting ready to call her, but then he heard my message and called me first.  He said he liked the sound of my voice better than the other woman, whom he never actually did call. But anyhoodle. . . .

We made a date for the following night.  We were to meet up for drinks at a local restaurant at 7:30.  Since this was an actual blind date, we described what we would be wearing and what we looked like.  Taking a chance, right?  Oh, no, no...but wait.

I was a nervous wreck the next day.  After I dropped the kids off to stay with their father I went home to shower and dress. I was so nervous I called Beth [you know, the one who got me into this in the first place?] and told her I wasn't going.  I couldn't do it.  She laughed and told me to get my butt out the door and go or she wouldn't talk to me anymore. She said since I was already ready and had promised I had to go.

So I did.  I was 20 minutes early and found a table in the bar area.  I ordered a bourbon and coke and must have looked incredibly nervous because the poor waitress took pity on me and asked if I was on a blind date.  When I replied yes she brought me a second round on the house.  Fortified with free liquor I began to relax and when I looked up he was walking up the stairs.

WOW.  He was exactly as he said he was.  Height, weight, eye/hair color, but he forgot to mention he was drop dead gorgeous.  I about fell over.  I saw him scanning the bar and a worried look came over his face.  I saw him focus on a woman sitting at the bar who was dressed almost exactly like me, with the same hair color, but a very different body type [much shorter/bustier than me].  I gave a little wave and he noticed me.  A smile crossed his face and he walked over. I could not breath, but managed a small hug and a peck on the cheek.

After an hour I excused myself to go to the ladies room and ran walked to the bank of payphones in the lobby to call my sister in law [pre affordable cellphones] and gushed at how wonderful Pooldad was and to thank her for coercing me into finding him and going on the date.

The date lasted 10 hours. I don't think the guy who served us coffee at TGIF's was too happy to do it for 4 hours.

Needless to say it has worked out pretty darn well. heehee

Oh?  What does this have to do with spending $10 you ask? After we became engaged my lovely sister in law, Beth, presented me with her phone bill from the previous May.  Seems the message I left Pooldad cost her $10 and she was collecting on her matchmaking fee.

I happily paid her.

Truly the best $10 I have ever spent.

[I hit the wrong button and screwed up the auto post - so :P - you get it this afternoon. heehee]

Thursday, August 4, 2011

One More Trip Before It All Begins

Yes, my friends - we are off to the country one more time before our August whirlwind begins.
We won't be able to get back down to the house until early November, so we are going to fit in one more weekend of fun while the weather is still favorable to outdoor activities.  I am very excited.

Oh, and there is the small matter of the coleslaw we forgot in the 'fridge.  We do need to clear that out so no one finds it in a few weeks covered in mold. heehee

I will be auto posting two stories that I have wanted to share with you while I am gone.  Saturday's will be "The Best $10 I Ever Spent" [it WAS!] and Sunday's will be "Top 10 Reasons Why Owning a Swimming Pool Makes You Dumber".

Enjoy your weekend Tadpoles.  We'll see ya' on the flipside.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Beware of BB&T

Here is a new twist on identity theft.

BB&T is a major banking institution in the states.  They are not our bank, but we do have to deal with them once a month.  Once a month Pooldad visits a branch and cashes a check in order for us to pay our rent.  Every month we pay the $5 fee to cash the check because we do not have an account with them.  And every month Pooldad is asked by the teller to open an account.  He ALWAYS says no.

We didn't like BB&T, but now we HATE BB&T and someone [hi Kumar] is going to be fired today.

And here's why:
Last Friday [July 29th] we checked our mail before leaving on our mini trip.  Imagine Pooldad's surprise when he opened two pieces of mail from BB&T.  The first one was a welcome letter, thanking him for opening an account.  The second one was his new pin number for an ATM debit card that went with the account.

He was NOT happy and immediately called BB&T's 24 hour banking line.  He got a recording at 5:30 pm but was able to leave a message.  When no one called back, Pooldad called two more times on Monday.  He still could not get a live person, so again left messages.

Monday night we received the ATM card in the mail with his name on it.  Tuesday he tried again to call them. Finally, yesterday afternoon, I got through to a live person, who sent me along to the check fraud department, where they sent me along to the fraud department and from that department I was sent to yet another department only to be told that they couldn't give me any information since I wasn't the account holder but that my husband could call back.  Which he did when he arrived home from work.

This is when he was told that he had opened an account on July 26th at a branch located in my old hometown.  Now, he had cashed the check at that branch on that day, but he DID NOT open an account and he told the fraud department person that.  She suggested we call the branch and discuss it with the manager.  Which he did.  And he discovered that the teller's name that he dealt with was Kumar [so tempted to put his last name here] but he wasn't in at the moment. The manager called him and requested he come back to work to discuss the matter.

While we waited for that phone call Pooldad told me that there was one thing out of the ordinary that happened the day he cashed the check.  The teller had taken his driver's license and the check away from the window saying he had to call the account holder and verify that it was okay to cash this check for Pooldad.  The teller was gone for a few minutes, came back and gave Pooldad the cash.

When the manager called back she told Pooldad that Kumar had come back into the bank and was insistent that Pooldad had opened an account on the 26th and he had the signature card to prove it.  At this point I asked the manager if their tellers worked on a bonus system for opening accounts.  She hemmed and hawed and gave me some lame answer that "no, it isn't a bonus system per se, but they can receive promotions and whatnot by hitting their quota every month."

Ohhhkay then.  I asked for a copy of the signature card and the manager said she couldn't do that as it was privileged information.  I responded that since Kumar was so SURE my husband opened the account then the card was my husband's privileged information and they could release it to us.  She said she had to call us back.

The next phone call we received was from the manager's boss who repeated that they couldn't send along the signature card but that Pooldad could go to the branch and look at it there.  Finally, after going around and around with her she agreed to email me only the signature line of the card so we could see for ourselves the [forged] signature.  We thanked her and let her know we would call her back as soon as we had it.

We laughed.  The signature isn't even close.
For those of you who don't know our last name does not start with an "M".*
And for those of you who do know our last name have fun laughing at this.

The funniest part is it is an obvious forgery copied from Pooldad's driver's license.  How do we know that?  Well, when they print up the licenses in VA they have a habit of cutting off the bottom of the signature, so all the loops and whorls that would be on the bottom of the signature are chopped off.  Which is exactly what the forged signature looks like.  Busted Kumar. So busted.

When we called back the head manager and informed her that we could prove this wasn't Pooldad's signature and we were going to do so on Wednesday she said fine, she would meet with us at the bank at 9 am.  We asked her to immediately close the account and this is where it truly confirmed our suspicions.  She said it had already been closed on July 30 th and that there were never any funds in it.

Now, I ask you, who opens an account with NO money [is that even possible?] and then closes it 4 days later while on a mini vacation where there is no cell service, no internet and no BB&Ts?

Yeah, that.

So, along with a visit to the bank we will also be visiting our local police department to file a report for fraud.

Be careful out there Tadpoles.  And if you can, avoid BB&T at all costs.  Evidently they hire criminals.

Have a good one! and keep smiling!

*I have no problem posting this forged signature because it isn't even close to Pooldad's - heck I defy anyone to figure out what his name is from that scratch.  And if you know his real name, as some of you do, please do not post it in comments. Thanks!

Monday, August 1, 2011

Vacation Country Pictures

Ahhh. I finally got my lovely laptop to work. [Love you my beautiful Toshiba please keep working.]

Here are the pictures from this past weekend in the country.  I wanted you to see the view and how pretty the house is.

7:15 am Saturday morning. Starting on the chores before the 100 degree weather hit.

Leaf collection at it's finest!
Little Momma helpin'
The view from the porch.   The ninth green.
Told you it was pretty!
The tree line in the back yard.

"Momma my new braces hurt. Thank you for the homemade icee."

Trying to get out of the way of her shot. She had already nailed me in the wrist once.  Not taking chances.
Good luck with that shot Wally.

Her favorite T shirt - the Beatles!

Daddy on the [putt putt] golf course.

Let's go fishin'!

Good times!

Now, when can we go back?