Or here in Skippyland it is a "Friday F-UP", but, since I am all about family and keeping it clean - I will be gentle. [I know it is not Friday, but this happened last Friday.]
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Here's the deal - there are some things you can do and some things you cannot do when you have my eyesight [20/700] and you have no corrective lenses to - I don't know- assist you in finding your way around the house.
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20/700 is pretty scary without the aid of contacts or glasses, let me just say. You can't gauge walls, colors, distance or depth [this is important later on.] Driving a car is not even an option, as in, you won't be locating said vehicle anytime soon. And reading? Nose to paper baby! - Heck, you can't see whether or not your pedicure is still holding it's own at your height of 5'8.
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Are we starting to get a feel for how blind Skippy is? Okay.
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I bring up the not being able to see my pedicure [feet] and depth perception for a reason, which leads me to my screw up.
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Spoiler: This story involves crafts [yay!] hot wax and my feet. It is not for the squeamish I assure you, but just thank me now for not posting the pictures. Really. Thank me.
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I decided the other evening would be a prime time to make my Christmas Wintergreen candles. [Small applause for trying to finish some presents ahead of time! Large smack in the head for upcoming stupidity tyvm.] These are soy based candles that are melted in a double boiler and then poured into cute little silver tins. Mental pic' working? Good :D
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The soy chips are white before melting, but become clear once heated [to 160 degrees]. That evening I discovered after the melt that I had no color to include [which would have given the clear melt COLOR and may have averted the upcoming big FAIL], but I thought since it turned white [once hardened] it would be adorable with a holiday ribbon/embellishment and didn't worry about the color. White is Christmasy, right? So with the soy chips melted, with the scent added, I was facing a bowl of clear liquid that I had to transfer from the bowl to the two inch high silver container.
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Now is the time you have to ask yourself:
1. Did Skippy decide, perhaps, she should just wait and reheat it tomorrow when she found her eye glasses or reinserted her contacts?
That would be a big "No".
2. Did Skippy think that, maybe, she wouldn't be able to gauge the amount to pour, because, y'know, she can't see?
Don't think that even occurred to her.
3. Did Skippy forge ahead and pour that pan of scalding wax into that little container with no thought to safety or the high burnability of skin or the fact that the probability of overflowing was defcon 5?
YOU BETCHA'
But this is because I am Skippy and what else would I do?
I mean besides talk in the third person? :D
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Yes tadpoles, that is what I did. And you do need to thank me again for not posting the picture of my foot because I am here to tell you - Hot soy wax? Burns...and it burns like no one's business on bare feet. [This is me being gentle again. Because you know and I know the words "Son of a ...." were coming out of my mouth as opposed to "no one's business" You're welcome.]
---
So there it is. My bravado, blindness and stupidity rewarded me with a burn on my left foot. The aftermath was that I had quite the icky wound on top of my foot. Which means no long pants, no slippers, socks, showering or, come to think of it, SLEEPING. Try sleeping with the "Burn o' Stupidity" on your foot. It is not happening folks. Not.happening.
Wednesday's Recipe to come later today!
---
Here's the deal - there are some things you can do and some things you cannot do when you have my eyesight [20/700] and you have no corrective lenses to - I don't know- assist you in finding your way around the house.
---
20/700 is pretty scary without the aid of contacts or glasses, let me just say. You can't gauge walls, colors, distance or depth [this is important later on.] Driving a car is not even an option, as in, you won't be locating said vehicle anytime soon. And reading? Nose to paper baby! - Heck, you can't see whether or not your pedicure is still holding it's own at your height of 5'8.
---
Are we starting to get a feel for how blind Skippy is? Okay.
---
I bring up the not being able to see my pedicure [feet] and depth perception for a reason, which leads me to my screw up.
---
Spoiler: This story involves crafts [yay!] hot wax and my feet. It is not for the squeamish I assure you, but just thank me now for not posting the pictures. Really. Thank me.
---
I decided the other evening would be a prime time to make my Christmas Wintergreen candles. [Small applause for trying to finish some presents ahead of time! Large smack in the head for upcoming stupidity tyvm.] These are soy based candles that are melted in a double boiler and then poured into cute little silver tins. Mental pic' working? Good :D
---
The soy chips are white before melting, but become clear once heated [to 160 degrees]. That evening I discovered after the melt that I had no color to include [which would have given the clear melt COLOR and may have averted the upcoming big FAIL], but I thought since it turned white [once hardened] it would be adorable with a holiday ribbon/embellishment and didn't worry about the color. White is Christmasy, right? So with the soy chips melted, with the scent added, I was facing a bowl of clear liquid that I had to transfer from the bowl to the two inch high silver container.
---
Now is the time you have to ask yourself:
1. Did Skippy decide, perhaps, she should just wait and reheat it tomorrow when she found her eye glasses or reinserted her contacts?
That would be a big "No".
2. Did Skippy think that, maybe, she wouldn't be able to gauge the amount to pour, because, y'know, she can't see?
Don't think that even occurred to her.
3. Did Skippy forge ahead and pour that pan of scalding wax into that little container with no thought to safety or the high burnability of skin or the fact that the probability of overflowing was defcon 5?
YOU BETCHA'
But this is because I am Skippy and what else would I do?
I mean besides talk in the third person? :D
---
Yes tadpoles, that is what I did. And you do need to thank me again for not posting the picture of my foot because I am here to tell you - Hot soy wax? Burns...and it burns like no one's business on bare feet. [This is me being gentle again. Because you know and I know the words "Son of a ...." were coming out of my mouth as opposed to "no one's business" You're welcome.]
---
So there it is. My bravado, blindness and stupidity rewarded me with a burn on my left foot. The aftermath was that I had quite the icky wound on top of my foot. Which means no long pants, no slippers, socks, showering or, come to think of it, SLEEPING. Try sleeping with the "Burn o' Stupidity" on your foot. It is not happening folks. Not.happening.
Wednesday's Recipe to come later today!
