Monday, January 24, 2011

Got Mice?

Since Chief was nice enough to gift me an "LOL Award" for having a funny blog I thought I should post something better than my last post where my brother is being a loon.

I appreciate your comments on that post very much and didn't realize there are a lot of clones running around in this world that resemble my brother.  I feel for you.  We all need to get together and have a "World Appreciation for Nutcase Family Member Day."  Or in most of our cases we can just call it "My Sibling Rewrote History. Yours?"

Don't. Just don't go in the grey house.

Anyhoodle - Pooldad and I were talking about funny stuff the other day and we recalled this story.  It still makes my sides hurt thinking about it.

The first home Pooldad and I owned together was a brand new home that we were the first to occupy.  It was a lovely, big home located next to a wide open field.  We called the field the "common area."  The kids could play there - it was safe and within eyesight of the house.

Unfortunately the common area was owned by the local power company and they were responsible for mowing it and maintaining it.  I say unfortunately because they never took care of it. Never mowed it - never so much as looked at it.  The grass was taller then my 6 year old son.

Enter the mice.  Lotsa' mice.

The winter came and the mice decided it would be a good deal to take up residence in our home.  I wouldn't have had such a problem with them if the understood the one tenet of being a "house pet" - do your business outside.  These mice [as they tend to be] were poopers - I could not stand the mice poopies all over the house and it was driving me bananas.

We tried snap traps. 
We tried catching them by hand. 
[stop laughing]
We had a dog and TWO cats.
Although the dog DID get stuck in the couch trying to kill one. 
He got props for that.

We tried everything.


Until someone suggested we try sticky traps.  Basically they are pieces of paper with a high density sticky surface.  When the mouse steps on it they stick.  They don't die - humane y'know - but [as you will come to see] it REALLY pisses them off and you go in, pick up the trap, extricate the rodent and throw it out the door with an "Adios!" and hope they don't come back.

Doesn't really work as the package says tho'.

The first night we laid the traps down [we followed the poop trail and placed them accordingly] I awoke to a very loud "eeek, eeek, eeek" coming from our master bathroom linen closet. I nudged Pooldad and said "Honey! Honey!  There is a mouse."  He didn't move.  So I hit him and whispered, really loud, in his ear "GET UP! There is a MOUSE  making a helluva lotta noise in the bathroom."  I must have smacked him hard enough because that got his attention.

He stumbled into the bathroom, opened the closet and exited with one little mouse stuck to the trap. The thing was screaming [as only mice can do,  I suppose] while my husband walked out the bedroom door to dispose of Mr. Mickey.

This is where I should point out that not only was it winter, but my husband was wearing boxer shorts. 

Only boxer shorts.

And was half asleep.

I followed him and saw him go outside to the common area.  I watched as he tried to pull the mouse off of the sticky paper.  

Tug-pull-curse-tug-tug-pull-curse.  Repeat.

No dice.

Still carrying the mouse on the paper, dressed in underwear [and by now, I am sure, freezing] he marched back into the house and grabbed a butter knife.

I stood in the foyer [being very dutiful you know] and watched him slam back out the door and attempt to PRY the mouse off the paper with a dull knife, in the moonlight, the whole while cursing the invention of sticky paper mouse traps.

Finally, after minutes of trying to pop the mouse off of the sticky paper, he gave up and FLUNG the paper, mouse and all, into the common area.  It landed upside down, on top of very high grass, with the mouse's feet stuck to the paper and just hanging there.  

It still hadn't fallen off.  giggle.

He just looked at the mouse, hung up 4 feet off the ground, squeaking loudly, mumbled a few expletives and returned to bed.

The best part is we went out the next morning and found the sticky paper in the same position as the night before with NO mouse adhered to it.

We repeated the process for two more nights [sans butter knife but with the addition of shoes and a coat for Pooldad] and simply frisbeed the mice out into the hinterlands, stuck to the paper.  

They stopped coming into the house after that.

It was like they KNEW crazy people with A LOT of glue lived in the grey house and they all got together and decided "Oh HELL no - don't go in THERE.  Didn't you hear what happened to Bob, Sally and George?"

I still laugh. heehee


Mynx said...

so funny. We had a problem with mice once. But usually the cat takes care of them

Odie Langley said...

We have had good luck with the sticky stuff. Ours comes in a plastic tray and the last time I used it I caught two at the same time. Haven't seen any more either.

becca said...

haha got to love the mice we tend to get a few field mice every winter

Life in the mom lane said...

be prepared for someone to come by and anonymously tell you how inhumane that was...

our first house had a dirt crawl space under the back half and a stone basement- with lots of mouse droppings in we got a cat....
minimal mouse problem after that...

one winter we kept count with a paper on the frig on which every time she caught a mouse a little paw print was marked to indicate a "kill".

34 that first winter- she was good!

Bouncin' Barb said...

Wasn't there a movie about that crazy family in the house next to the empty lot? bwahahaha

Jeannie said...

We've had the odd mouse - I know they aren't supposed to be singular but in our case they do seem to be. Found one drowned in the kitchen sink (he used to steal the Beneful dog food, take it under the stove and sort it into separate piles - guess he liked some more than others.) Found one drowned in the toilet. Easy disposal. And the cat got the last one. These were all at least a year apart. Other than the last one, there were never poops found anywhere. Must have done their stuff in the walls.

Thisisme. said...

Really funny Skippy!! I could just visualize Pooldad in his boxers, trying to get the flipping mouse off the sticky strip, and then flinging it away! We have fields all round us, but we feed a couple of ferrel cats and we have never seen a mouse in the house in the 13 years that we have lived here. (I'm glad to say!!).

Teresa - in the Middle Side of Life said...

LOL - that is hysterical! I can just picture that scene, too.

Did you read Marla's mouse posting? She inspired me to write mine, but I wouldn't have had to if Maisey hadn't left the evidence in the middle of the floor.

Too funny.

qandlequeen said...

Yeah the sticky traps aren't so humane. I had one mouse try to gnaw its leg off.

Anonymous said...


That's hilarious, the mice screaming trying to get off the paper image in my head is priceless!